Happy Mondays deliver a scrappy Tuesday

 

 

On Tuesday last week I went with a friend to Singapore’s Foo Chow Hall to attend a gig by the legendary Manchester band the Happy Mondays.  The Mondays helped popularise a cheerily trippy, dance-rock sound that was dubbed ‘Madchester’ – a reflection of the fact that many of its proponents originated in the same north-of-England city: see also the Inspiral Carpets, James, 808 State and, most notably, the Stone Roses.  In fact, the Happy Mondays and Stone Roses were to the Madchester sound what Nirvana and Pearl Jam were to grunge.

 

I love the Happy Mondays but I have to concede they only ever made three albums of note and those were recorded a long time ago: the memorably titled Squirrel and G-Man Twenty-Four Hour Party People Plastic Face Can’t Smile (White Out) (1987), Bummed (1988) and Pills ‘n’ Thrills and Bellyaches (1990).  I think that last album is superb, consisting of classic tracks from start to finish.  But the, shall we say, hedonistic nature of the band, and the chaos that seemingly surrounded them, meant the Happy Mondays would never reach those heights again.  In the 36 years since, they’ve put out two more albums, to mixed reviews, and ticket sales for their concerts have depended on the nostalgia and affection of their fans – fans who, these days, are getting long in the tooth.  I should know.  I’m one of them.

 

In fact, the last time I saw the Happy Mondays live was back in 1999 and even then they seemed a legacy act. That was at Scotland’s premier summer music festival, the now-defunct T in the Park, and the Mondays headlined Stage 2 on the festival’s second and final day.  By that point I was well-lubricated, but I do remember their set being brilliant even if it didn’t offer much musical innovation.  The next day, at work, a couple of my colleagues who’d also been at T in the Park, in a soberer condition, reacted to my report of seeing the Happy Mondays at Stage 2 with horror.  “What?” they exclaimed. “You ventured over there?” That year’s festival had taken place close to Edinburgh and the crowd at the Happy Mondays’ set had all resembled characters from Irvine Welsh’s Trainspotting (1992).  I guess I’d been too high-spirited to notice.

 

It was a contrast 27 years later to see the band in the saner surroundings of Singapore, performing before an audience of comfortably well-off Western expatriates – nearly all of whom were a bit on the wrinkly side. My friend, who’s in his early forties, must have been one of the youngest people on the premises.

 

 

The line-up isn’t quite the Happy Mondays one of old, but it’s not far off it. There’s cussed singer-songwriter (and tambourine-tapper) Shaun Ryder, long-term guitarist Mark Day, long-term drummer Gaz Whelan and the talismanic dancer and maracas-shaker Bez, who is surely history’s greatest example of a band-member who doesn’t really play anything and is just there to help the vibe.  Keyboardist Dan Broad has been on board since 2008.  Sadly not around anymore is bassist and Ryder’s brother Paul, who died four years ago. Their bassist in 2026 is Mikey Shine, who was originally involved with the band for half-a-dozen years in the noughties.

 

Female vocalist Rowetta, who’d been a mainstay of the Happy Mondays since 1990, left the band in 2024. Her departure was followed by acrimony a year later when she alleged that Shaun Ryder had punched her during an altercation in 2000 – something that Ryder strongly denies.  Singing in her place on the current tour is Firouzeh Berry, whom I believe is also Bez’s wife.

 

This year the band is celebrating the 35th anniversary of Pills ‘n’ Thrills and Bellyaches and thus we were treated to all ten tracks from that album performed in chronological order.  The remainder of the set contained several songs from their earlier two albums, plus the haunting and mighty dance track Hallelujah from the 1989 EP of the same name.

 

 

Okay, let’s address the elephant in the room.  Shaun Ryder’s voice was never a thing of beauty and nowadays it’s well past whatever prime it once had.  His singing was rough, even sepulchral at times.  I occasionally found myself imagining I wasn’t listening to the Happy Mondays at all but to another Manchester band, the Fall, who were famous for the growly stream-of-consciousness vocals of their late founder and singer-songwriter Mark E. Smith.  Well, it sounded like a version of the Fall with some cool dance grooves.

 

The issue was particularly noticeable during the first couple of songs when the front-of-house engineer hadn’t yet got the balance right at the mix desk and Ryder’s voice wasn’t just prominent but drowning out the rest of the band.  At least Ryder was open about his vocal shortcomings, for example, groaning before one of the more melodic numbers that he’d be forced to attempt to sing more.  Firouzeh Berry’s voice, meanwhile, had to do some heavy lifting to compensate.

 

 

Still, some songs emerged relatively unscathed.  The band delivered a fine rendition of Hallelujah late on and, thankfully, my all-time favourite Mondays tune, Loose Fit from Pills ‘n’ Thrills and Bellyaches, was one of the evening’s highlights.

 

Bez was as spritely as ever.  Indeed, cavorting about the stage, he looked more mobile and agile than he had any right to be, considering his age (62) and his long history of reckless and excessive living.  During the Covid-19 pandemic, I chuckled when I heard he’d decided to become a fitness instructor and, to help folk stay healthy during lockdown, was putting exercise videos on YouTube under the title Buzzin’ with Bez.  But this fitness lark obviously hasn’t done the old bugger any harm.

 

 

So, due to one key component of the band sounding like an asthmatic frog, it was a scrappy evening – but istill a fun one.  The audience certainly enjoyed themselves.  The fact that many punters had turned up wearing identical Happy Mondays T-shirts, emblazoned with the 2026 tour logo, and that prior to the gig they’d been sinking pints in pubs along Tyrwhitt Road outside, gave the proceedings the rowdy air of a football match – albeit one where the whole crowd supported the same team.

 

Indeed, it seemed appropriate that the venue was Foo Chow Hall, a place that frequently hosts tournaments by Singapore Pro-Wrestling (SPW).  Just as the Happy Mondays are a bit lacking in musical finesse these days, so pro-wrestling is hardly dripping with proper, competitive sporting integrity.  But you can’t deny that both serve up plenty of entertainment.

 

Who chairs wins

 

 

On Friday, August 16th, two friends and I ventured into the Foochow Building on Singapore’s Tyrwhitt Road to experience Hardcore Island 2: A Fine City, the latest extravaganza staged by the Singapore Pro-Wrestling (SPW) association.  We’d been laggardly in getting there, having supped a beer too many in a nearby pub, and arrived near the end of the evening’s first bout: one between local wrestlers CK Vin and Emman.  As we entered the hall where the action was taking place, we were greeted by the sight of CK Vin throttling Emman with a folded chair.  He’d put the back chair-frame over Emman’s head and had the rear edge of the seat deep in his throat.  Unsurprisingly, soon afterwards, Emman submitted.

 

This, it transpired, was a ‘chairs match’ – which, Wikipedia informs me, is a contest where “only chairs can be used as legal weapons, but the only way to win is by pinfall or submission in the ring.”  I liked the publicity blurb with which the SPW presaged CK Vin and Emman’s fight: “You’ll want to get to your seats now before the wrestlers take them all for weapons.”

 

© Singapore Pro-Wrestling

 

Before I moved to Singapore, it’d been a long time since I watched a professional wrestling match.  In fact, I hadn’t been a fan of the sport since my boyhood in Northern Ireland.  This was when World of Sport, Independent Television’s Saturday-afternoon sports show, would always have a four o’clock slot devoted to what people in those days simply called ‘the Wrestling’.  Watching the Wrestling on TV, I quickly became obsessed with such larger-than-life figures as Les Kellett, Mark ‘Rollerball’ Rocco, Tally Ho Kaye, Jim Breaks, Mick McManus (catchphrase: “Not the ears! Not the ears!”), Big Daddy (catchphrase: “Easy! Easy! Easy!”), the gargantuan (six-foot-eleven, 685 pounds) Giant Haystacks and the mysterious, masked Kendo Nagasaki who claimed to be channelling “the spirit of a samurai warrior who, 300 years ago, lived in the place that is now called Nagasaki.”  (He himself lived in Wolverhampton.)  But I never got into the brasher, showier and slightly more glamorous pro-wrestling spectacles served up in subsequent decades by America’s World Wrestling Federation (WWF), later World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE).  And though for most of the 1990s I lived in Japan, I didn’t get into the super-popular New Japan Pro-Wrestling and All Japan Pro-Wrestling promotions either.

 

But I’d always enjoyed wrestling movies, such as Darren Aronofsky’s The Wrestler (2008) or Stephen Merchant’s Fighting with my Family (2019).  Okay, Mr. Nanny (1993) with Hulk Hogan not so much.  And it often occurred to me that I’d like to see some live bouts.  So, last year, when a mate told me of the existence of the SPW and invited me to one of their events, I thought, why not?

 

Anyway, back to tonight’s proceedings.  The second bout on the bill involved two more local wrestlers, Destroyer Dharma and Kentona – the former defeating the latter with a pinfall, which in wrestling jargon is when you hold your opponent’s shoulders against the ring-floor long enough for the referee to count to three.  Not for the last time that evening, the fighting spilled out of the confines of the ring and into the surrounding hall – much to the glee of the spectators, always happy to get a close-up view of the carnage.  I should say that the crowd was a pleasing mix of young and old, male and female, and Singaporeans and foreigners.  It was a far cry from the audiences I remember watching the 1970s British wrestling, which seemed to consist mainly of demented old grannies who’d hobble forward and club Mick McManus with their handbags whenever he was against the ropes.

 

 

The third battle tonight was a hotly anticipated one between Singapore’s Jack ‘N’ Cheese and the Gym Bros, who hail from Pattaya in Thailand.  Jack ‘N’ Cheese are BGJ, aka Jack Chong, described on his Instagram page as the ‘Beast of Benevolence’; and the Cheeseburger Kid, whose yellow cowl-mask makes him resemble a jaundiced Deadpool.  The latter has become a popular fixture of Singapore’s pro-wrestling world and tonight it looked like he had a mini-fan-club in tow – a small but voluble group in yellow T-shirts at the front of the crowd who cheered on his every move.  It has to be said of their opponents, the Gym Bros, that they were at least a wee bit camp.  One had a headful of Debbie-Harry-style blonde hair and wore white spats up to his knees. The other sported a weedy moustache and was clad in tight pink shorts whose contours left little to the proverbial imagination.

 

To the delight of everyone – bar the Gym Bros – Jack ‘N’ Cheese won the bout through another pinfall.  And nobody was more delighted than the Cheeseburger Kid, who reacted to victory by leaping up into BGJ’s arms and posing there for the cameras.

 

 

Next came a tussle between two more wrestlers from the SPW roster: Bryson Blade, wearing bad-boy black-leather pants, and Referee Ryan, who, appropriately for a person sometimes working as a referee, was attired in a more sober costume of black and white.  This was billed as a ‘Loser Gets Caned Match’.  The blurb for it declared, “…the loser will be forced to take a lashing with a Singapore cane post-match!  Gather round, people!  You’re about to be taken back, school assembly style.”  That references the fact that Singapore not only allows caning as a judicial punishment – a maximum of 24 strokes for a range of criminal offences – but also as a corporal punishment in schools, for male pupils who commit serious offences.  (Actually, it took me back, since corporal punishment was still legal in Northern Irish schools in the 1970s and I got caned a few times, though not with a Singaporean rattan cane but a beechwood one.)

 

 

Eventually, Referee Ryan lost through a pinfall and ended up receiving ‘five of the best’.   I wasn’t sitting near enough to the ring to be sure, but I suspect the cane-strokes may not have landed with the fullest possible force.

 

 

Following a 15-minute interval, bout number five saw another pair of Singaporean wrestlers in action, Zhang Wen and Riz. The former won, again by a pinfall.  Then came a trio of female wrestlers slugging it out in a three-way battle.  Representing Singapore in this scrap was the formidable Alexis Lee, who also goes under the moniker ‘Lion City Hit Girl’ and is the city-state’s very first lady pro-wrestler.  The Straits Times newspaper recently described her as “…a rampaging figure of death, who will stomp and slam her opponents swiftly and ruthlessly.”  I assume the Straits Times writer got the ‘figure of death’ idea from the white skull-make-up that covers half her face and her costume of tank-top, shorts and leggings patterned with bones and ribs.  Her foes tonight were two Japanese wrestlers, Miyu ‘Pink Striker’ Yamashita and Koya Toribami.  I know tori is the Japanese word for ‘bird’, which may explain why the latter fighter turned up in an elaborate, beaked bird-costume.

 

After a hard-fought contest – at one point the three of them were engaged in a sort of treble bearhug, with the bird-themed Koya Toribami caught in the middle like a piece of chicken in a chicken sandwich – Alexis Lee won with a pinfall.  Afterwards, outside the ring, she posed defiantly with a glass of beer, which she’d definitely earned.

 

 

The seventh and final bout was an all-Singaporean affair pitching two teams of three wrestlers against each other – the Horrors, consisting of Aiden Rex, Dr Gore and Da Butcherman, and the Midnight Bastards (billed in some quarters as ‘State of Bastards’), consisting of RJ, Mason and Andruew Tang, aka the Statement.  Despite being the co-founder of and head coach at SPW, Tang / the Statement has a villainous ring persona: “Embrace the Statement or I will make a statement out of you!”  This was billed as an ‘Xtreme Rules’ match, which meant there were no rules.  Not only chairs could be utilized as weapons, but also tables, a big wooden board that someone dragged out from under the ring, and even a stepladder.  Yes, I’d noticed how that stepladder had been parked all evening at the far end of the hall and wondered when it was going to come in handy.  It did when the spiky-mohawked Da Butcherman clambered up one side of it, and Andruew Tang, in gold-streaked trousers, clambered up its other side, and they faced off at the top.

 

 

At another point, the wrestlers hurriedly assembled, IKEA-style, a table in the ring.  Then someone poured dozens of small, multicoloured, plasticky things across the tabletop.  And soon after, an opponent got slammed down on the covered table, on his back.  Ouch!  One of my friends thought the plasticky things might be drawing pins.  I had a horrible suspicion, though, that they were pieces of Lego.  I remember how much my foot hurt after I stepped on a Lego-piece as a kid, so having your back thumped down against a whole table’s worth of those must be hellishly sore.

 

Anyway, thanks to yet another pinfall, the Horrors emerged victorious.  And that was it for the night.  Just to make the experience a little bit sweeter, on our way out, we encountered the Cheeseburger Kid standing at the Foochow Building’s entrance.  We told him how much we’d enjoyed his fight and he seemed to genuinely appreciate our warm words.

 

Certain sports purists might quibble about the tongue-in-cheek, even corny nature of some of what was on show tonight.  But the SPW’s get-togethers never fail to provide fun and excitement.  The city / island state of Singapore has a reputation for being a calm, ordered and well-run place, but it’s nice to think that there’s a little part of it where, thanks to the SPW, for an occasional few hours, good-natured anarchy takes over.  Where it becomes an anything-goes ‘lion city’ or a riotous ‘hardcore island’.  Where – to borrow a quote from Lars Von Trier’s Antichrist (2009) – “Chaos reigns!”